This weekend will be different. I really do want this. I will prove it to myself. I will be determined. Documenting that fact here is useless, unless I go out and do it. I could give a list of excuses why I fall apart, but that too is useless. I have no excuse.

Self-assessments work well for me because I am good at being brutally honest with myself. I had a tough conversation with myself this morning, but its what I needed. I will re-visit this topic next Monday and I know the tone will be different. I will break the cycle and be proud of myself for doing so.

I AM THE REASON I AM OVERWEIGHT

There is not another soul on the planet that made me overweight. I am to blame. I could continue to blame others, but that will get me nowhere. I did this to myself by not taking care of myself, not eating properly and not working out. I DID IT.

I continued to think about this for a few hours and it felt good to take responsibility for my actions. When I finally convinced myself that I was to blame, I started to think about how to correct past actions. The answer is easy…I have to fix it. There is not another soul, pill or institution on this planet that will lose weight for me. No one. Just me. It feels good to know that my weight loss rests on my own shoulders to achieve. I don’t have to depend on anyone to achieve my goals. Its all on me. I like it that way. I got myself into this mess, I’ll get myself out of this mess.

Once I understood that the blame and the reward belongs to me, its easier to tighten the shoelaces, roll up the sleeves and get to work. Fixing what I’ve broke. Take responsibility for your actions and take the appropriate steps to correct it. All you need is you!

I have two goal lists, one for short-term goals and one for long-term goals. The short-term list is a working/living document that changes frequently when I accomplish one or when I need to add one. These are goals to accomplish in a day (commonly referred to as a to-do list), a week and even a month. If they go past a month, they get put onto the long-term list. My long-term list is broken out my 6 month and 12 month goals. The 6 month goal list is really what I am shooting for and my benchmark for success. , while the 12 month goals are more lofty.

My goals list is personal. They are my goals. They don’t get shared with anyone, wife excepted. It helps that my wife knows my goals. She helps push me to accomplish my goals. She is my partner in crime.

It helps me when I write down my goals and look at them often. When they are written down, they are tangible. They are real. Knowing what my goals are and how to accomplish them is important. Just as important, is the practice of reviewing my goals.

From time to time, I take a look back at the results and take a few moments to review what goals I accomplished and what goals I missed. Its easy to look at the goals accomplished and celebrate the victory (which is important and something I wrote about here). But the tough part comes in reviewing the goals in which I missed the mark. Its easy to dismiss them or to keep pushing them out, but I have honest conversations with myself. Why did I fail? What factors contributed to the failure? What could I have done better or different to accomplish that goal? What will I change to make it happen in the future?

These are important questions I ask myself when I fail so I can learn. So I can get better. So I can achieve. How do I know if I can do better if I don’t know what I did wrong? These are tough conversations to have with myself, but they are necessary. Did I fail becasue of an uncontrollable external factor? Sometimes this happens, but most of the time its because I didn’t go out and get it. I didn’t push myself. I got lazy. I made excuses. I flat out didn’t do it. These are most likely the causes of my failures. It helps when I recognize that in myself, vow to get better and then go out and make it happen.

When you create a feedback circle for yourself, you make yourself better. Write down your goals, stick to them and accomplish them. If you don’t accomplish them, figure out why and get back at it. Don’t beat yourself up too much, that’s counterproductive. Just know that you can do better and then be better!

On my way home from work, I began to review my day. My first thought went immediately to what tasks I didn’t accomplish. This is my usual routine: run through the things that I didn’t get done and start beating myself up about it. My mental checklist usually runs through the bad foods I consumed that day, the fact that I didn’t workout, the tasks I need to do the next day etc. But then a little spark went off that literally put a smile on my face.

I started to think about the good things that I did today. I finished at or below my alloted calorie intake for the day, I rode my bike to work, I accomplished several tasks. Of course, I still ate a few bad things, I didn’t go to the gym and I didn’t get everything done I set out to do. But I did do several great things. Yet, my mind usually focuses on the things I didn’t do, the bad food I ate and my daily failures.

It was mind clearing and uplifting to be able to think of the positive things; the things I accomplished and the good food I ate. I contribute that spark to the way I feel as a result of losing weight. There is a weird cause and effect between weight loss and a positive attitude. I also think that you need to have a positive attitude to lose weight. They are dependent upon each other.

I am going to try my best to focus on the things I did well that day and not the things I didn’t do.

Be well. Feel great.

This is exactly what is happening to me. I have lost a nominal amount of weight in the last two weeks (2-3 pounds), but I have lost inches as my belt is not as tight and my once perfect fitting pants are now slightly baggy. To me, this is just as gratifying as seeing pounds drop from the scale screen.

Seeing and feeling that my clothes are fitting better, is an amazing boost to my mental state and motivates me to keep eating right and exercising. This is very important because I read a lot of blog and forums where people are frustrated about not seeing results. The majority of the time, their unit of measurement is the scale and not any other benefits. They might be losing inches, but they ignore that and focusing on just the scale. This can be depressing and lead someone to give up and going back to their habits that got them overweight in the first place.

The benefit of being in a great mental state in regards to losing weight is an amazing phenomena. Not only do I feel great, but I feel like I have a little bit more confidence and esteem that is projecting outwards. Like I mentioned, it also helps in wanting to keep going. A positive attitude is a huge factor in a quest to get healthy.

For all of you trying to lose weight, don’t just look at the scale…pay attention to how your clothes are fitting!

One night, my wife and I were out to dinner with a bunch of friends. One lady made it clear that she was dieting and was not going to order an entree, just a salad. Everyone was impressed. But then dessert time came around and she ordered the double decker chocolate extreme. Most people thought nothing of it cause she saved up her dinner calories for dessert. But the way I saw it is that she really didn’t want to lose weight bad enough. You don’t order a dessert like that if you truly desire to shed pounds.

It comes down to this age old addage: mind over matter. If you don’t mind, then nothing matters. If you don’t mind that you can’t eat a candy bar, than the candy bar really doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is what you mind. So put your mind to being healthy and losing weight and it will be the only thing that matters!

Now I have a confession: I write this post not only to motivate others, but as a reminder to myself. I am 100% guilty of going crazy over the holidays and justifying it to myself one way or another. I wanted to put this down eternally so I can refer to it and let it resonate in my mind.

What are your tips for staying on track?

Feel Great. Be Well.

• Gyminee
• Fitizens
• FitLink
• Gimme20
• FitFiend
• Traineo
• IntroPlay
• WalkingSpree
• PeerTrainer
• Run Fat Boy
• iTrainHarder
• MyFitTribe
• RunningAhead
• FitSpott
• Comotivate
• Diet Fitness

As with any social network, its best to sign up and give it a chance to see where you feel most comfortable. Not every site is for everyone, and I would bet that if you gave them a chance you will find a site that will help you achieve your goals.

As I try each one of these out, I will re-visit this post and leave a remark about my thoughts on each site.

Please leave a comment about your experience with any of these sites. If you know of other fitness social sites, please leave a comment and I will add it to the list.

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